how to build confidence as a woman

How To Build Confidence As A Woman Who’s Very Self Critical

This post is all about how to build confidence as a woman who’s ready to ditch self doubt.

Disclaimer – This post may contain affiliate links, which means I’ll receive a commission if you purchase through my link, at no extra cost to you.

how to build confidence as a woman

It’s no secret that confidence is the most important quality to possess for a modern day woman. But this journey to go from shy to confident can be extra hard, if you have a self-critical inner voice.

Trust me, I know what it’s like to have a voice in your head that’s constantly telling you what you did wrong, or how lame, stupid or crazy you are! And when you do something right, it’s a fluke!

Maybe you got this voice from your critical parents, or the aunt who constantly pulled you down, or the high school bullies.

It takes a toll on your confidence. But you can’t let that hold you back.

The funny think about confidence is that it has to start with you! You have to believe in yourself first before you can let others believe in you.

Now, there are some hacks that can give you an instant boost of confidence, and then there are confidence tips that will take some time to show results but will actually help you silence that inner critic in the long run!

Luckily, this list is filled with confidence tips in both categories.

This post is all about how to build confidence as a woman who’s very self critical.

how to build confidence as a woman

Quick Wins To Build Confidence

1. dress up well

Every time you need a quick confident boost, just put on your best outfit, high heels, & maybe some makeup – it always works!

You don’t even need to be too fancy. Just taking 5 minutes to put some effort into your outfit can automatically make you feel more confident.

And as weird as it is, people also tend to take you more seriously if you look more put together!

2. posture corrector

Your body language determines your confidence.

I mean, if I ask you to sit like the next level version of yourself, would you adjust how you’re sitting right now? Probably, yes!

It’s obvious you feel more confident, when you walk a little taller, keep your head high and shoulders back.

In fact, studies have shown that trying power poses for 2 minutes increases confidence and mental strength. There were self-reported, power poses and upright postures.

If you’ve gotten into a habit of naturally slouching all day, this posture corrector will change your life. It buzzes every time you start slouching to remind you to correct your posture.

3. deep breaths

When you’re feeling nervous, or anxious, taking deep breaths and telling yourself that you’re safe in this moment, actually helps!

It would get you out of the panic state and into a state of calm, if not confidence.

Also, notice how your body reacts the next time you’re feeling confident. Like actually notice and it’ll help you with your answer on how to build confidence as a woman.

Whether you’re taking deep breaths, or smiling, or feel a sense of lightness around your chest.

So you can use these physical traits to cheer yourself the next time you feel low.

4. maintain eye contact

Things like, maintaining eye contact whenever you’re having a conversation, instead of checking your phone,

Or greeting people with a smile while entering a room, instead of trying to disappear in the corner, ooze confidence!

This helps you break the initial barrier with people and helps you connect better. It’s the simplest trick on how to build confidence as a woman.

5. Start with today’s to-do list

Confidence comes from accomplishing goals. Now that might take some time, but you can give yourself that boost of confidence by setting and accomplishing your daily goals.

Write down things that you want to get done everyday in a to-do list, and see how many of them you complete by the end of the day.

Also, if you’re in the process of self improvement, you’re probably starting some new healthy habits too.

Using habit trackers to track your progress would hold you accountable and crossing off those columns everyday will definitely increase your confidence.

6. Move your body

It’s no secret that workout out or doing any kind of physical movements, release endorphins and serotonin, that are the feel good hormones of your body that motivate and energize you.

So, whenever you’re feeling low or self critical, try a workout.

I know, it’s hard to push yourself to do anything in those moments of self doubt, but pick a physical activity that you truly enjoy and that won’t feel like a chore.

Even if it’s just dancing to your favorite song. And you’ll notice the difference in you mood almost immediately. I love going on hot girl walks whenever I feel low.

hot girl walk essentials

They’re literally so comfy!

7. affirmation cards

Sometimes when you’re in those moments of doubts and despair, all you want is for someone to say the right thing and tell you ‘it’s gonna be okay’.

Well, that’s what these affirmation cards will do for you.

Now, I don’t believe that repeating affirmations will somehow magically make you the most confident person in the world. NO.

But it will bring you to a neutral state, if not positive. And sometimes, that’s all you need in that moment.

Related Posts : 60+ Confidence Affirmations That Actually Work

8. baddie playlist

Songs are essentially the better form of affirmations, isn’t it?

So, create a baddie playlist of all the songs that make you feel like the main character and would give you the boost of motivation you need in the moments of self doubt.

Cue Revolution by The Score 😉

9. buy something for every one of your achievements

Rewarding yourself is just a way to solidify that moment when you feel proud of your achievements. It helps you acknowledge your victories, instead of just moving on the next thing.

And it obviously gives you an extra source of motivation.

Whether you want a cute dress, a new book, or a self care day. You can also make it a tradition to buy something significant like a piece of jewelry, or a designer bag (if that’s your thing) for your big life achievements.

Confidence Building For The Long Run

10. “I’m proud of you” list

Make this an everyday habit, but to give yourself a head start, here’s what you should do today – Write down 100 things about yourself that you’re proud of!

Now, I know 100 seems like a large number. Hell, if you’re like me, even 10 seems like a huge number.

But give yourself a day and start writing about not just your big achievements, but also about your personality traits and values, like how helpful or resilient you are!

And once you get over the first 20-30, trust me, you’ll end up writing more than a 100!

Now, from tomorrow onwards, write down 1 thing everyday that you’re proud of doing.

If you have a loud self critic, like me, this is going to be game changing on how to build confidence as a woman.

11. do what you say you’re gonna do

Keep your promises to others, and to yourself. It builds integrity, not just with others but with yourself as well.

This makes others look at you like a reliable and responsible person, which btw, is a great leadership trait.

More importantly, when you do something you said you were gonna do, it gives a signal to your brain that you’re someone who actually follows through on their goals.

So the next time you set a goal, instead of giving you excuses, your brain would start coming up with ideas on how to actually make it come true.

12. finish a challenge

I LOVE 30 day challenges – no matter what type. Because every time I finish them, I feel so much more powerful and self confident.

Mainly because there’s gonna come a time in those 30 days when it’d be easier for you to quit the challenge, and when you push through those moments, you show yourself that you can overcome any obstacles if you put your mind to something.

And obviously, doing something for 30 days brings you faster results and ends up boosting your confidence. It’s my favorite tip on how to build confidence as a woman

So, whatever new habit you want to build – workout, morning routine, or reading – just start a 30 day challenge.

Related Post : 20+ Ultimate 30-Day Challenges To Change Your Life

13. create an everyday achievement list

If you feel like you’re wasting your days, and are not getting enough done, this list is going to SAVE you!

Every night, write down all the things that you got done today. Be generous and write down even the smallest of tasks, because they matter.

And you’ll realize that you’re actually getting more done than what you give yourself credit for!

14. do first, (Over) think later

Here’s the thing, confidence is created from results, and results are created from actions. Funny how we keep on waiting for things to happen the other way around.

And you know what, that one thing that you’re so scared to do (getting a new job, asking your friend out, or moving to a new city), the minute you pull that trigger and take the first step to doing it, you’ll end up wondering why didn’t you do it before!

I’m talking from personal experience here! I was so scared to learn to drive (for no apparent reason – or maybe I had my lame reasons). And the day I started learning, I felt soo good I wondered why I waited for so long.

15. make a bucket list, finish it

This is just another fun way to show your brain you can get shit done.

You know how romanticizing your life helps you have more self love and practice self care. Similarly, finishing your bucket lists would make you feel accomplished and more confident that you can create a better life for yourself.

Just the feeling on ticking things off on a list is already so self validating and perfect for how to build confidence as a woman.

16. knowledge is power

The less you know about something, the more you fear it.

So if you are holding yourself back because of the fear of failure, or fear of unknown, the easiest way to get over it is to learn more about it.

And most importantly, have the knowledge of self (i.e., be more self aware), so you can stand your ground more confidently despite of what people are saying.

A lot of times people keep following these vague goals that other people set for them only to realize that they don’t feel satisfied because they never really wanted it in the 1st place.

17. write down what do you think about you is true. then, question it

This exercise will really help you get out of that victim mindset.

Write down your life story as you see it. Basically write down all the things that you keep telling about yourself – especially the negative self talk.

Like, how you’re a failure or how you embarrassed yourself.

And now question these believes. Is it the 100% truth?

Of course not!

So, the next time your inner critic tells you that you’re a failure, remind yourself of the times when you’ve succeeded.

Talk back to that inner critic and shush them. Don’t let it define your story.

18. learn from other confident, badass woman

There’s so much you can learn by just observing others around you.

If you have a strong independent woman in your family, or in your circle, that you look upto. Spend more time with them, try to learn and observe how they go on about in their day to day life.

And if not, you can obviously turn to the internet.

Read books by successful women, learn from their interviews, follow them on the internet.

I follow a several business woman on the internet and every time I watch their videos, I get so motivated and confident that if they’ve done it, so can I!

19. Forgive your past self

If you’re constantly derailing yourself for your past mistakes and have lost confidence because of the mistakes you made then, it’s time to forgive and forget!

One thought that really helped me do this was ‘My past self did the best that she could with the knowledge that she had.’ Give your past version some grace.

And holding yourself back now based on your past. You’re not the same person you were last year, hell, you’re not even the same person you were 3 weeks ago.

You’re constantly changing and improving, and so you’re more capable of doing the things now that you weren’t able to do earlier. So, give yourself another chance!

20. help others along the way

The single thing that makes people genuinely happy is helping others – no matter big or small.

It also helps others be more confident in you and develop a leadership persona in your group, while making you feel more self reliant and responsible.

This post is all about how to build confidence as a women.

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